We Fake News—A Mother's Day Protest

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#MomsAreMad About Books

Tired of being "knocked off" in books

May 13, 2018: "We used to get KNOCKED UP. Now we get knocked OFF," said Iva Hadenuf, a 55-year-old mother in Reading, Pa. "Knocked up was way better."

Hadenuf is not alone. On Mother's Day, moms around the country TOOK TO THE STREETS to protest their treatment at the hands of authors and publishers.

"Authors have been KNOCKING US OFF in novel after novel. We're damn sick of it!" Hadenuf exclaimed.

Like wildfire
As #MomsAreMad spreads across the country—publishers, politicians, and pundits have been STUNNED by how quickly it's gone viral.

"By Jove! This thing's taken off like WILDFIRE," said NBC's Cal Brittlebastion.

"My goodness, these gals are over 50! We had NO IDEA they knew what social media was, let alone how to use it," he added.. "Go figure."

A long history
Knocking off moms goes back 300 years: to the VERY FIRST novels—at least to the 1700s with Daniel Defoe's Moll Flanders and continuing into the 1800s with Dickens's David Copperfield.

The 20th century saw the likes of Anne of Green Gables and Nancy Drew—NO MOTHERS. Solve that, Nancy.

Far more recent novels also lack mothers: The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, Ahab's Wife, The Goldfinch, I Liked My Life, to name only a handful.

Peters smeared
Bernadette Peters, star of stage and screen, is #MAM'S most celebrated voice

"I've been SMEARED. They didn't just kill me off," steamed Peters. "They turned me into a CHILD DESERTER!"

Peters, of course, is referring to the 2012 bestseller Where'd You Go, Bernadette?

"Hell, yes, it's about me!" piped Peters. "Is there any OTHER Bernadette?"

Male support
Surprisingly, #MAM has drawn support from men.

"The sooner they win this thing, the sooner they'll be BACK IN THE KITCHEN," said one man, who wished to remain anonymous.

Fronta Loeb, special to The Daily News and LitLovers.

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